I hope you all enjoyed your holidays and your hearts were filled with an overabundance of love and joy. I technically haven’t “celebrated” Christmas in at least 12 years, which as I type this I realize is pretty wack. I’ve always been excited about birthdays and love being celebrated and celebrating others. The surprise element is really my thing and I almost have a child like attempt at containment as I count down the time to reveal the surprise gift that I’ve purchased for someone. I’ve seen pictures of me as a child on Santa’s lap and I can remember writing a letter to Santa yearly as a child, but over the years, my excitement, expectation, and preparation seemed to dwindle and disappear with each passing year.
My memories run back pretty far, so I can remember at around 3 or 4 years old being lead upstairs by my mom so that Santa could bring in my Christmas gifts. Once we were upstairs, we played the classic 80s game of Jax in the open walkway and I watched as my dad and uncles brought in my presents. I’m sure that was when I realized the Santa gig was up and after my brother and sister were born, most of the toys and gifts under the tree were for them. If I did receive gifts from family members or family friends, they were always too small or too young for my age range and went to my younger siblings anyway. Once my mom told me my Santa letters were really going to my grandmother, Christmas was something I emotionally checked out of. At around 14/15 my mom became Muslim, so Christmas was completely out of the picture. I told myself Christmas was just created to “take” all of your money and for children whose parents lie to them and make them believe in false realities. It’s no wonder I haven’t celebrated in all this time with that mindset.
This year was different. I went along with my sister’s idea to put up a tree and didn’t have any pushback (even to her hot pink, overly feminine decorations. LOL) The tree was put up 5 days before Christmas, but put up nonetheless, I had a Christmas stocking, and I completely got excited about shopping and buying things. I shopped online, I waited in ridiculously long lines in stores (for sales of course) and I bought some pretty cool wrapping paper. I even bought myself some things! I felt like a kid again. My niece, Rainbow, even got in on the Christmas spirit! (She’s the cutie pie below with Santa) I felt happy and anxious and could barely sleep on Christmas Eve. I tried to encourage everyone to open gifts at midnight but it didn’t fly. LOL
After waking up at least 5 times to a jet-black sky early Christmas morning, I finally jumped out of the bed at the slight glimpse of sunlight to open gifts. I made an elaborate seafood boil and even had a consultation with a potential client. Everyone I ran into seemed so happy and so friendly. I was gifted Korean fruit randomly by a young Korean girl dressed in a Santa suit who happened to see me in passing. That was classic! It was a completely feel good day, that I would have missed had I continued to let my past disappointments guide me.
It’s interesting to think that all this time, I’ve been under the influence of such a distorted narrative based on something that happened so long ago. I’ve allowed that influence to keep me from such a fun and love filled day and experience. In an attempt to protect myself from disappointment, I built a wall and denied my own happiness.
Most people are dealing with money in the exact same way. Think about it. If your money is not where it should or could be, what’s your influence? Have you made attempts to create a budget and save more but were unsuccessful? Are you just accepting your financial struggle as “it is what it is”? Have you been disappointed in watching your savings balances go up and down so you’ve just acquiesced to give up? What’s keeping you from doing something different? What’s keeping you from actually getting to a place to receive the financial abundance and freedom that you deserve? Are your financial fears even your own, or are you under the influence of someone else’s?
It’s important to know what’s stopping you, but perhaps more importantly, it’s important to change. You’re missing out if you don’t and you don’t deserve to settle!
As we wrap up the end of 2019, I’d like to admonish you to jump out and try anything that you’ve been keeping yourself from that could ultimately make you greater and ensure your happiness! I already have consultations being booked for 2020, but if you’re really ready to jumpstart your money greatness and get a head start, I’m open to taking 2 (maybe 3) new clients before January 1st. Will it be you? Schedule HERE if it is.
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